Wow, I cannot
believe that a whole year has gone and passed since I first went to Africa last
summer…Since I first stepped foot onto that piece of land that has had such an
impact on me…on my life…and on my heart….And here I am again, sorting through
donations, getting my shots and taking my malaria pills…and of course, trying
to pack as much as I can into as many suitcases as possible!! I’ve prayed for
so long to be blessed with the opportunity to go back and I’ve worked on
preparing my heart—again—well, as much as it can be prepared. And now here I am…Saying
good-bye to my nice, warm…comfortable home and ready to once again leave it
behind for a few weeks while I step outside my comfort zone, ready to take in
all that God has in store for me…ready for Him to use me…and in doing so giving
Him all the glory.
As I prepared my
head and heart for this mission trip I spent a lot of time reading my
devotional: Anticipate. This book is
filled with great stories and prayers from others who have traveled the world
and gone on mission trips with desires to change a life, change a heart, change
a community and to change the world. All of the advice is wonderful and quite
helpful, but as I read this book two specific themes played over and over in my
mind…Peace and Patience. And, maybe these subjects weren’t even written about
that often…but for some reason they just stuck with me and I felt as if I would
need to be reminded of them throughout my trip.
So, I packed my
suitcases into my car and I was headed towards the cities to stay with my
sister Steph. I went to bed appreciating my comfortable sleeping arrangement
but was so excited that I could hardly sleep. My flight didn’t leave until the
following afternoon so I didn’t need to wake up early, but I knew from last
years experience that I would absolutely appreciate having a full night of
sleep and would enjoy waking up feeling refreshed and ready to go…Although it
wasn’t quite that easy! What’s a girl to do when she’s just SO excited and
ready to go?? … My phone beeped and I had received a text message from Caitlin…she
was still up too! This made me laugh—we were both so excited and couldn’t
sleep! Finally after making sure we had everything and were prepared for our
trip, we said goodnight and that we would see each other tomorrow once we both
landed in Washington, D.C.
The time had
come…Patrick was dropping me off at the airport and I actually found myself
getting a little teary eyed. It wasn’t that I wasn’t excited for Africa—because
I certainly was! I’m just not sure what it is about Patrick and airports but it
just reminds me of him in the Army and brings back these sad emotions. However,
as he helped check me in and helped me with my 3 LARGE suitcases that each
weighed 50 pounds EXACT…and as I carried my 20 pound backpack and my other
carry on…I realized that this was hopefully the last time I’d be going on a
mission trip without him…and that hopefully next time he would be able to come
with. Just that thought brought happiness to my heart…because I so deeply love
these trips and all that I learn from these experiences and I know that he
would too.
I arrived to the
airport early just to be sure I had plenty of time…I was waiting at my gate to
hopefully start boarding soon and my departure time got pushed back 40 minutes…Okay
I thought, that isn’t too bad…I should still have plenty of time in Chicago to
make my connecting flight. Soon we were able to board and once we all got
settled in on the plane, we ending up waiting again for another 45 minutes
before we even took off. Thankfully we had landed safely in Chicago and
although I was a little nervous I was going to miss my connecting flight I
reminded myself that it would definitely be okay. Well, once I got to my gate I
found that my flight had been delayed again…then soon my gate was changed….and
it was delayed again. I was originally supposed to arrive to Washington, D.C.
around 6pm…but by the time I actually left Chicago, I didn’t get to D.C. until
10pm that night. It wasn’t bad at all…I had a great attitude, made some new
friends… and I reminded myself of that one key word…Patience. Yes, peace and patience. I hadn’t even left Chigaco yet
and God was already teaching me about patience!
Thankfully
Visiting Orphans supplied each of our team members with the same “Go. Be. Love”
t-shirt so as I traveled around the airport all by myself—along with ALL of my luggage,
I looked for our V.O. shirts and before I knew it, I found a group of them!
And, Caitlin was on her way to help me with my luggage. YES!!! This was it!
Meeting the rest of the team members made me SO excited…I could hardly wait for
all that God had in store for us…for our team…for the people of Africa…for the
children at Fiwagoh…and for my heart. Oh Lord, you are SO good to me…thank you
for calling me to Africa…thank you for our team…thank you for this opportunity.
“You are called to be so much more. God has
opened doors for you to go on this trip. He is calling you to grow in your
faith, to become someone better than you are right now. He is opening your eyes
to live differently than ever before. The challenge for you will be not just to
know the right things to do but to put them into practice. And to do this, not
just on your upcoming trip, but from now on.”
Caitlin and I
had so much to catch up on and we ended up staying up pretty late—only had a few
hours to sleep before we had to get up and check out again. I remember laying
in my bed having such a familiar feeling about this hotel…because not too long
ago Shelby and I were in this same exact hotel…feeling so excited and also a
little nervous with the uncertainty that trips sometimes hold…but yes, we were
excited. And, now here I am…sharing a room with Caitlin and falling asleep with
a heavy, grateful and excited heart. Morning was just a few hours away and soon
we would be on our way…soon we would be boarding a long flight to the one place
that for some reason, has always had my heart—even before last summer. Yes,
soon…we would be landing in Africa…So, I thanked God again one more time and I
rested my eyes…I needed as much sleep as I could get…
Because in the
morning, my second journey to Africa begins.
As most of you know, when I was in Africa last summer there
was a little boy named Richard that stole my heart. We had an instant
connection and I am certain it was love at first sight. After I met him I was
trying to figure out all that God was doing. In the short amount of time I was
there, I tried to comprehend all that I had experienced and all that I was
feeling for this sweet little boy. I soon realized that God’s ways are far too
great and that I wouldn’t be able to figure all of this out without His
leading. So…after coming back home to my big, soft bed and a nice hot bubble
bath…I prayed…and prayed…and prayed. I had such a variety of emotionsand I realized that I had to commit every
plan, thought and idea to the Lord…and then, I was reminded that HE HOLDS MY
WORLD IN HIS HANDS…Of course He knows
what is best for both Richard and me. So I will pray about it and I will follow
His leading. From day one I agreed I would pray about this and that if God
opened doors…I would walk through them.
As I prayed I felt God encouraging me to fight for him and
to particularly pray for Richard’s grandmother. Then, this past spring I
believe God was working a miracle. I was informed about a blog that was written
ALL about Richard and his grandmother…this was absolutely HUGE and I felt as
though this was another hard…heavy door that was being opened…and although
finding Richards grandmother seemed impossible…God planned for this and
provided me with answers that Patrick and I had been praying about night and
night….This whole time I had been telling myself to fight for Richard and to
depend on God…and that if God’s plans are for Richard to be our child—than he
simply will. And if in the end God closes that final door, we’ll know this isn’t
what He has planned for us…and that if we are unable to adopt Richard…we’ll
pray about another child we’re supposed to adopt.
I messaged Amani to explain our situation and how Patrick
and I would just love to adopt Richard. I asked if I would be able to at all
meet with his grandmother just to inform her of the love that we have for
Richard. I understood that maybe she wouldn’t be fully supportive of the idea—especially
since I am aware that she would like to see Richard live and grow up in Uganda…but
I just felt like she needed to know our interest in her sweet grandson. After
waiting and praying patiently for God’s blessing, I received an email from
Amani that said: “We understand your love
and concern about Richard, and we really do appreciate it. But to follow Amani’s
rules and to protect Richard and his situation, we are sorry to say that we are
unable to introduce you to his grandmother. We feel this is just best and we
hope you understand.” I wasn’t quite
sure what to expect, but there was a big part of me that thought it was very
doable to meet his grandmother. She is just about 30 minutes from Amani and I
really felt like maybe God would allow this. Once I received the email I was of
course bummed…but I continued to rely and put my hope in God. I also had the
thought of, “If this is God’s will it’s
not going to matter—He’ll make a way and will continue to move mountains. I’m
not worried.” …And honestly, I’m not 100% sure this door is closed…maybe
when I actually get there something miraculous will happen…and Oh wouldn’t that
be beautiful if it did! I know God performs miracles on a daily basis and so I believe
with all my heart that something powerful and BIG could happen! …On the other
hand, maybe God is closing the door on Richard…and if this is the case, there
is no doubt my heart will be broken…and no matter what happens…my love for him
will always be there… Patrick and I will
continue to hold him close in our hearts. After all, this little boy has had
such a big impact on my life and has inspired me greatly!!! Although this wasn’t
the news I wanted to hear…I am thankful that I found out beforehand so that I
have a little bit of time to prepare my heart. I also am finding that I have peace….I do feel
at peace about this. I thought maybe my emotions would be out of control…or
that I would be stressed about this…and honestly…I have such a peace about this
that it is sort of hard to understand…I’m a little surprised at myself that I’m
not going crazy over this!! …But I was reminded about Philippians 4:7 The peace of God, which transcends all
understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. The
reason why I have such peace about it is because I am confident in Christ and I
know He has GREAT plans. I don’t need to fear—yes, it’ll break my heart of that
final door closes…But either way, I know and love the One that is in control…I
have nothing to fear…nothing to stress…I simply have peace.
I want to remind you that I am very calm about Richard’s
situation currently as I type this and before I leave…But oh boy, I have no
idea what it’ll be like when I can hold him in my arms again. No matter what
happens…no matter the future…and even though I won’t be able to meet his JaJa,
my heart is absolutely FULL of JOY …knowing that I’ll get to live with him at
Amani for a full week! I can’t even comprehend what this will like and although
it might break my heart even more, I am okay with that. My prayer for some time
now has been Lord, break my heart for
what breaks Yours. My heart was shattered when I first went to Africa last
summer…and I won’t be surprised if it’s shattered again.
Now, I would like to share some pictures with you of
Richard.These are a few pictures that I
have come across over the past few weeks and months. They just put a smile on
my heart every time I look at them. OH RICHARD—You MELT my HEART SWEET BOY!!!
Can’t wait to be back with him!!!
As I have written and talked about the blog I came across of
Richard that was all about him and his JaJa. It was my friend, Brooke, that informed
me of it. Brooke and I have never actually met but she is volunteering at Amani
this summer. She has been there since June and leaves in August. We’ve talked
so much and so although we’ve never actually met in person—I feel like we
already are such great friends! It’ll be SO FUN to finally meet her as well!!!
:)
There is something else that I would like to share with you.
When I first found out about Richard I was told his dad was never in the
picture—which he wasn’t…and I was told that his mother was sick (and eventually
died) due to AIDS…which she did. I was also told that Richard was not HIV+…which is false. Richard is HIV+. When I was first told that his
mother was sick because of AIDS—my first thought and concern was of course for
Richard…and before I was told that he wasn’t HIV+…I knew it didn’t matter what
so ever. I love him and if God led me to be his mother I would of course feel
honored and would love, care and provide for him regardless of his health—simply
put: it didn’t matter. When I told
right away that he was negative and that he wasn’t an HIV+ baby I felt relief…thankful
that he wouldn’t have to live the rest of his long life with this virus. But
this past winter I was indeed informed that Richard is a HIV+ baby and that
because of this he is of course on daily medication…Can I just tell you my
first thought?? ….I wanted him to be my son even more. I wanted to be able
to fully care and love and provide and give him the proper medical care that he
is in need of…I wanted to rescue him and devote my time and energy to him…I wanted
to do what all mothers do: fight, love and protect their children. I understand
that some people might think I’m crazy…might think this is dangerous…to adopt a
child that is HIV+…when really, I just want to be honest—it is NOT as bad as most
people think it is. Richard is on daily medication which keeps the virus under
control and prevents it from actually turning into AIDS…he will NOT pass it on
to me through a hug or a kiss or if I give him a bath. I understand that this
is a serious medical condition…but at the same time I am NOT concerned. So what
if Richard is HIV+…I.LOVE.HIM.
Because Richard is HIV+ his immunize system is weaker than
the “average” child and he is unable to fight off common infections as easily….one
common thing is warts…over the past few months Richard started to slowly
develop small warts on his face…mainly around his eye…but over time they have
continued to get worse. When I realized this it broke my heart and I wanted to
be able to help him…I contacted Amani and they informed me that he was being
treated and that it would just take time for the warts to pass. I just wanted
to explain this so that you were aware and understood everything about Richard…and
if you could of course continue to keep Richard in your prayers.Below is a picture of Richard and Brooke on
one of Brooke’s first days at Amani!!! :) He is SO BIG!!!!
Well it’s about time for me to start to get ready and to
head to the airport…But I wanted to share a few more pictures with you. Over
the past few weeks and the past 2 months…there have been so many NEW babies
that have arrived to Amani. I’ve been seeing all of them from the pictures
Brooke and Sandra have been sharing. I see these pictures and I know without a
doubt that I am supposed to go to Amani. Yes, my first initial concern was for
Richard…I felt like I needed to go back to him…to visit him again and to love
him. Which of course is still true…But I am also realizing that there are other
children just like Richard that need love and that deserved to be cared for…and
these are just a few of them.
I leave for AFRICA tomorrow morning around 11am!! Please
pray for a safe flight for my team and me!! We appreciate it and I hope to be
able to connect and share more pictures with you all once I am there!!! :)
Oh my goodness! I leave for AFRICA in less than a week!!!! This Saturday I will fly out of Minnesota and then I will leave with our team on Sunday for AFRICA!! I have just a few days left at home and I feel like I still have quite a bit to do until I leave! ...Finish packing...finish my summer class...and help as much as I can with all of Shelby's last month wedding details....as well as try and get some of our wedding details set. Goodness, goodness! So much to do but SO thankful for all of these BLESSINGS I have in my life!!!!
My team leader for this trip to Africa is the same team leader I had last summer when Shelby and I went. Her name is Diana and I am so excited to be able to be back in Africa with her! Her daughter Liz went last summer as well and I am super excited to see her again too!!! This trip to Africa is such a unique trip and I can just feel that it's going to be POWERFUL! And what is really exciting is that Diana's whole family will be coming over to Africa this time!!
....Diana's husband, Bret, and Liz are actually in Africa RIGHT NOW! They went two weeks early to start planning and figuring out the details of the playground at Fiwagoh. So although most of our team hasn't physically left yet--in a sense it feels like our trip has already started because those two are over there and are starting the process!! They made it over safely and have been at Fiwagoh working hard and loving on all of the kids there. Here are some pictures of their work...
Diana shared this video and I thought it was powerful. Some people wonder why I go and serve the many orphans in Africa...while others are 110% supportive. Regardless of how you feel, I want to encourage you to watch this video. This is such a great description of how an orphan feels and WHY it is IMPORTANT to live out James 1:27 and to VISIT them. A short term mission trip IS important....it DOES make a difference and it will make a positive impact on the children we love and meet.
...I'm so thankful God has given me this desire to serve His children and to have a HEART for the ORPHAN.
Good Morning Family and Friends! Would you mind helping me out with a HUGE favor? I just entered into an Engagement Story Contest and I need YOUR help!:) As most of you know or could probably assume, Patrick and I are trying our best to keep our wedding cost as LOW as POSSIBLE. We both feel that it's so silly to spend a lot of money on ONE DAY. I have always just thought this was crazy, but now that I've gone away to Africa and Ecuador, I realize even more how foolish this really is to spend thousands and thousands of dollars on one day. It just doesn't make sense to me and so I don't want to do it. So, we are both praying and looking into ways on how we can still have our DREAM WEDDING but at a much LOWER COST. I just came across this contest and I thought, "Hmmm, what would this hurt? I might as well give it a try!" The contest is super easy--I shared our Love Story--my last blog post that I wrote, and now I have to get as many friends and family to VOTE for our Love Story! The winner with the MOST VOTES will receive $2,000 towards their wedding cost...Can I just say that this would be HUGE!! :) The voting is happening RIGHT NOW and ends AUGUST 19, 2012. It's my GOAL to have 100 VOTES BEFORE I LEAVE FOR AFRICA! Would you be willing to help us out? Click on the link below, select "VIEW ENTRIES" and then "VOTE" for our Love Story!:)
Well, as most of you know, Patrick and I are
ENGAGED!! I can’t even begin to explain just how happy and thankful I am!! He
has been such a blessing in my life and it feels great to know that we are
finally engaged!! :) Before I get to the story of how he proposed, I would like
to take some time to share with you about our Love Story.
For as long as I can remember, I have always wanted
to find my future husband…marry him… start our life together…and have children.
I really feel like this is what I was created to do. So, for such a long time—I
dreamed and prayed about my future husband—even though I didn’t know what he
looked like…or what his name was…I knew God did and so all I had to do was pray
for him. I especially felt like I needed
to pray for him when I was a junior in high school. I can specifically remember
this one time where I felt like God was just placing it on my heart to pray for
my future husband—more than ever before, so I followed His leading and I
prayed.
When I graduated from high school I went to college
and I remember hoping so bad that I would just meet “him” right away! I felt
like I would of course meet him right away because this is all I wanted…I
wanted to stop wondering and hoping and I just wanted to know what he looked like and who he was. It was Christmas break of my freshman year in
college and one of my best friends from high school was home on her Christmas
break as well. I hadn’t met him yet—and
although I was told often by my friends that I was too picky, I never really
felt that way. I just knew that God had someone special in mind for me—so why
would I settle for less than His best? …I met up with my friend, Miranda, and
she had told me how she met this guy a few months ago and that he was going to
be home over Christmas break as well. I
never really thought too much of it…but these were her exact words, “Shanna, I met this guy. He introduced
himself to me and said that he liked my cross necklace. When I met him, you
suddenly popped into my mind—like he would be perfect for you! You just have to
meet him. His name is Patrick.” I
laughed because I thought that this would never actually work—that this guy she
was talking about would actually be my future husband, but since I was still
single and didn’t really have anything else to do, I decided I would let her
introduce me to him.
We decided to meet up in Marshall one night with a
group of friends. I met him and thought he was super cute—but we really didn’t
have that much time to talk. A group of us ended up meeting a few days later to
go to the movies…I still didn’t think anything of it because I honestly felt
like he wasn’t interested in me. I think it was the next day and I had received
an inbox message on Facebook—it was just small talk, nothing too special, but I
started to wonder if he really was interested? …I decided to meet up with him
and some of his friends to go play bingo until Miranda was done with work. When
I arrived he came to meet me outside and as we walked in he opened the door for
me and he told me I looked really pretty…I remember thinking, what a gentleman
and that this was the type of guy I was interested in…someone who was kind, respectful
and who was a gentleman.
Before we knew it…it was our last weekend of
Christmas break together. Miranda was heading back to Miami for school and I
had to leave for Mankato…And Patrick was headed back to Germany. I remember
feeling so sad at this point because the group of us had so much fun together…it
was so great to be back spending time with my BFF and plus, I really felt like
Patrick would be a great guy for me—and not just a great guy, but I remember
thinking how he would be PERFECT for me.
That last night, I had to say good-bye to Patrick
and before I knew it…he kissed me! And the crazy thing is…I looked at him and in
my mind I thought, “I’m going to marry him
someday…” You might think that sounds a little crazy—I know!!:) But for so
many years I had been going to visit with my Great Grandma Hazel and so many
times I asked her about life and about love—and how in the world do you know
WHICH guy is the guy God has created for you. I’ll never forget what she
said. She replied back and said, “Oh
Shanna, you will know. Growing up I had kissed a few guys just to kiss them. I
would kiss them good-bye just because, but I never really felt anything for
them—I would just kiss them. But oh dear, when I kissed your grandfather for
the first time, I could feel it in my whole body…from my head to my toes. It
was different and from that moment on, I knew he was the one.” …Well, I always talk about my Great Granny
and how she knows EVERYTHING and how she seriously is the smartest lady in the
world—and she proved to me once again that she really knows everything :) …because when Patrick kissed me that very
first time…I could feel it in my whole body…from my head to my toes.
Patrick had to leave and as he left, I was sad but I
also was so excited—because THIS was the guy—HE was the guy! He was the guy God
had been preparing for me all my life and I had finally met him!!!
Since Patrick was in the Army we had a long distance
relationship right from the start—I’ve had so many people tell me how they
would hate to do that and they just couldn’t do it…I would always just smile
and think to myself, “I wouldn’t have it
any other way!” Patrick and I built
our relationship on trust, love and communication. All we could do was talk on
the phone so we got to know each other so well and really became best friends.
I never took him for granted and I always made time for him, just as he did for
me. I will admit that having him in the Army was difficult, we hardly ever got
to see each other the first 2 years of our relationship, but I also believe
that our relationship was so much stronger because of that.
It was when he was deployed to Afghanistan for 13 months
that really strengthened our relationship. He was able to come home for two
weeks and visit me while I was in Mankato…and I’ll never forget the morning
when he had to leave and that not to long after he would be heading to
Afghanistan. It was really early in the morning and so it was still dark
outside…He was in his uniform and as I hugged him at the doorway, the thought—“What
if this is the last time I see him” flooded my mind…and just as soon as it came
to my mind I made it leave…because I knew that no matter what happened or what
the next 13 months held…it is God that holds our lives in His strong and steady
hands—He would surely be with us no matter what happened. From that day on I
made it a point to always praise and thank God for all that He has blessed me
with…for His great plans and for His ways…after all, I was dating the man of my
dreams and I wasn’t about to get all down and sad by the “what if” thoughts
that could consume my mind. I knew every day was (is) a gift from God and I
would have a thankful heart—always.
I mentioned earlier about when I was in high school
I felt God tugging on my heart to pray fro my future husband…when I met Patrick
we had a very serious talk and he shared with me his last experience in
Afghanistan. He told me it was on June 8th, 2005 that his life changed forever.
He was on a mission and a rocket had exploded and killed two of his soldiers.
He explained to me that he was standing in the middle of them—and that both of
them—on each side of him were killed. He reminded me of how close he was, and
that he could just reach out his hand and touch them…but he didn’t understand
it—because they both died but he was in the middle and didn’t? It didn’t make
sense…we both reminded each other of how difficult times in life don’t
always make sense and sometimes we can’t understand what God is doing…and we
agreed that God was certainly watching over him that day and that it was indeed
a miracle that Patrick survived and that he only suffered minor injuries (although he still deals with them on a daily basis now) compared to the deaths of
his two soldiers. As we talked about this I was reminded of how I would have
just finished my junior year in high school when Patrick experienced a day that
changed him forever. I still get chills thinking about it…because I know
without a doubt that God told me to pray for Patrick and that somewhere my
future husband needed prayer…I just didn’t know who he was…what his name was…or
why I needed to pray, but as we finished this conversation I was reminded…I was
reminded of how real and true God is…I was reminded that God heard my prayers
and He protected Patrick on that very sad day because He knew that one day, he
would be my husband.
Finally Patrick was officially out of the Army and I
was so excited to have him here in America! The past few years have just flown
by as we both have been working hard at finishing our college degrees and have
been preparing ourselves for the future. And actually, as of yesterday, Patrick
has now officially completed his Master’s Degree in Sports Management! He is
officially done with school!!:) I am so proud of his hard work and his
dedication to our future—He is the type of man that wants to provide and help
as many children that we can—he knows I have big dreams and he does too, and he
always had said how he wishes he could of just married me yesterday—but he also
doesn’t want to rush anything…He reminded me often that he would propose when
he felt like God told him to. He has been such a faithful prayer in our
relationship and every time he prays with me I am reminded of the Godly man God
has blessed me with. I am so thankful for his strong faith and the very smart and dedicated
man he is!!
It’s sort of crazy to think that Patrick and I have
been together for over 5 years!! I always thought that as soon as I found my
future husband we would get married a few months after—after all, once you
know, you just know! What’s the use in waiting? But I know God has used our
time of dating to strengthen our relationship as well as prepare us for
marriage…and for that I am truly, truly grateful!!
Okay—so the story of the proposal!! :) This past weekend I headed to the cities to
have Shelby’s Bachelorette Party. We went to Still Water (SO BEAUTIFUL!!) and
had a really fun time! And as most of you probably know, I would much rather go
to church than go out and party. I know that probably sounds really cheesy—but it’s
true, I just would! I’m over the whole bar/party scene and I feel like I’m 34—not
24! Haha! I guess I just know what’s important in my life and I don’t want to
waste time doing or participating in things that don’t bring glory to God. So,
anyways, we were out for Shelby’s Bachelorette Party…
...I really did have so much fun hanging out with
all the girls and spending time together, but I was also secretly hoping everybody
would wake up early the next morning so I could make it back to Eden Prairie
for church. Patrick and I attend Grace Church in Eden Prairie as often as we
can or whenever we are around the area. I absolutely LOVE this church and
seriously get so excited when I know I can make a service at Grace. So I told
Patrick that I would keep him posted Sunday morning and that hopefully I would
be back in time to make church with him. The next morning, we actually didn’t
sleep in—there were 6 of us in a room and slowly we all started waking up
fairly early and I was able to make it back for church. I called Patrick to let
him know and before we knew it, we were in his car headed to church.
I guess now that I look back on the morning, he did
seem a little different—maybe a little nervous, but I really didn’t think too
much of it. We arrived to church early and found seats toward the back of the
church on the first level. If you’ve ever been to Grace Church, this church is
HUGE! So although we were really early, there were people walking around and
spread out waiting for the service to start as well. We’re always early so I
was used to this and it was completely normal. I sat there drinking my French
Vanilla Coffee and looked at the bulletin.
The actual church service started at 11:00am and it
was probably around 10:55am when all of a sudden Patrick got up out of his seat
and went down on one knee. I looked at him totally confused and wondered what
he was doing—I had NO clue! I asked him what he was doing…Then I saw he was
holding the ring in his hand and I said, “Patrick,
is this for real?” I was so shocked!!! I thought, “Hmmm obviously this is real if he has the ring!!” He then looked at
me…totally nervous and a little teary-eyed and said, “Shanna Michelle, God has blessed me by placing you in my life. You’re
the one I want to spend forever with. I’ve prayed about this for such a long
time and I couldn’t imagine proposing anywhere else but in God’s house since He
has always been at the center of our relationship. Will you marry me?” Ahhhh!!!! I honestly was still SO shocked!! I
couldn’t get over it—it was almost like we were in a dream or something! Of
course I said YES! And then before we knew it, the music started playing and we
stood up and started to sing. I couldn’t even jump or scream or get all excited
because we were in church—haha so we stood there like two little kids and kept
looking at each other and laughing, “Like
did this really happen? Are we ENGAGED!!!?”
He held my hand and told me that he felt like I just needed to be
engaged before I left for Africa…So that I could go find our children. I smiled
and said okay!:) He continued with, “I
don’t know what the future holds…or where we’ll be…maybe we’ll be in America or
maybe we’ll be in Africa…no matter what—it doesn’t matter. All that matters is
that we’ll be together because we’re meant to be together and we’ll figure out
the rest—Okay? I love you.” …My
heart melted and I was reminded of how true…right…great and faithful God is. We
don’t have all the answers, but we live for the One that does—He’ll take care
of us…He’ll guide and lead us. Whatever happens in the future, we’ll get
through it because we have Him and we have each other.
I was so surprised and shocked when he proposed that
I never actually cried—I certainly could have, but I was trying to hold all of
my emotions together. I was doing pretty well and then all of a sudden, a new song
started playing and as I stood there and looked at my beautiful ring and as I
held Patrick’s hand…I lost it completely.
I had heard this song before, but for some reason I felt like the song
was being sung directly to me alone. The lyrics in the song are so beautiful
and fit perfectly with how I was feeling.
Higher
than the mountains that I face…
Stronger
than the power of the grave…
Constant
through the trial and the change…
One
thing Remains…
This
one thing remains…
Your
love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me…
Your
love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me…
Your
love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me…
Those are the first few lyrics of the song…and as I
stood there, I realized just how TRUE that is. God is HIGHER than the mountains
both Patrick and I have faced—and the ones we’ll face together. Jesus is
STRONGER than the power of the grave! God is constant through everything—trial and
change…He is ALWAYS the same and of COURSE He blesses those who live and devote
their lives to Him. I wondered so many times when my time would come…when I
would meet my future husband…when would it be our turn to have a “normal”
relationship and not a long distance one…when would it be our turn to get
engaged, married, etc. I would wonder these things every now and then, but no
matter how much I wondered, I knew—God KNEW. I didn’t have to worry or wonder—I
just had to pray for our relationship and trust God because HIS LOVE NEVER
FAILS. He is TRUE to HIS WORD—He LOVES us and WANTS to BLESS our lives…we just
have to open our hearts and commit our plans to HIM.
…And so I stood there…overwhelmed by God’s grace…His
faithfulness and His love…and I was reminded again of just how in love with Him
I am…as well as how in love I am with the man whose hand I was holding. I
wanted to jump up and down with joy and I wanted to scream and shout…but all I
could do was stand there and give thanks to my God and to my Savior Jesus
Christ for the many blessings He has poured into our lives…
…And all I could do was thank Him for blessing me
with the greatest gift—His Love…and the Love of my future husband.
You might be wondering WHEN and WHERE we are getting married, but we aren't exactly sure at this time. We have always known for a long time now that we would love to have a Destination Wedding, so this is what we're looking into. We're checking on a few locations and hope to get the best deal possible, so once we have the location we'll pick the date and we'll be on with the WEDDING PLANNING!!!!! :) I am SO excited to MARRY MY PRINCE CHARMING!!!!! God is GREAT and I am BLESSED!!!!
Below is the song that played at Grace Church that
morning. I know I shared a few of the lyrics, but please pause to listen to it.
It spoke so clearly to me and I pray it speaks directly into your heart—just as
it did to mine.
Living for God. Learning along this journey called life. Seeking to love God with my whole heart.
"I will not leave you as orphans. I will come to you." John 14:18